The new Oscar Wilde.

http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/p/phil_collins.html

choice bits include:

"When I go on Japanese Airlines, I really love it because I like Japanese food."

and

"Another time, we had three days off in Australia, so we went out of our way to fly to Ayres Rock."

It's like a whole new Phil Collins has been opened up.

a happy note in the mail.

My former landlord = a dick.

The story is long and makes me grumpy to retell, but it looks like I'm gonna pull out the win on this one.


The second to last chapter of this overlong story looks like this:

I got a request for payment today in the mail. She's taking my whole deposit and want $300 bucks on top of that.

But, I've got the receipts for the stuff she threw away and lied and lied and lied about. ($220)
I believe I have the receipt for cleaning the air conditioner on the way in, to make her claim on cleaning it on the way out totally unreasonable ($50)
And the Toshima Tax office has pretty solid evidence that the cleaning company threw out government mail (prison = checkmate).

I believe that there is also at least one more false charge in that bill ($80), on top of the totally trumped up story that I put all the marks in the floor. If I had been more careful on the way in and taken some pictures, I'd be able to shoot that one down in an instant.


Just to make sure that there's no confusion, I think I'm going to issue my landlord a
bill for the missing stuff, including the day I had to take off to go to the tax office because my government mail had been thrown out.
Anyway, a win for the good guys... or at least "my team".